Pauline's Bookshelf: Stepping Heavenward

I'd use book covers for these posts, but copyright law is kind of convoluted and I don't want a DCMA notice.

Stepping Heavenward was a lovely read! It’s a fictional diary by Elizabeth Prentiss, following the life of a girl named Katherine Mortimer. One of my mentors gave it to me during a phase I went through where I was rather caught up in trivial worries of this world. In my journal I wrote of it, “This book is such an encouragement! A delightful breath of air, relieving such a sense of suffocation – and I have only reached chapter seven.” Part of this “sense of suffocation” came from being mired in the filth of some exceedingly worldly books I was attempting to analyze. When a Christian is entrenched in a field of godless thinking, they can only feel suffocated and depressed – which is what happened to me.

Now that you know where I was when I started reading Stepping Heavenward, let me tell you some of my favorite parts of the book!

My first realization that I would enjoy this read came when I saw the frivolity and impulsivity of the protagonist, sixteen-year-old Katherine Mortimer, or Katy. (“How dreadfully old I am getting! Sixteen!”) Though Katy is a fictional character, she is more genuine than some girls I know, including myself. This book is set in the 1830s-1850s, but young Katy has much in common with teenage girls of today: a tendency to oversleep, a fierce devotion to her BFF, and even a messy bun as her go-to lazy hairdo. I didn’t know messy buns were a thing back then!

But aside from her lighthearted thoughts (or “levity,” as she would call it – this book was published in the 1800s, after all), young Katy also struggles with how to live the Christian life. She promises herself she’ll pray more, control her temper, and exercise the discipline of self-denial, but this doesn’t work and she constantly berates herself for her failings. After an honest conversation with her pastor, Dr. Cabot, in which Katy admits she doesn’t know if she loves God or not, she still doesn’t have all the answers. And that is okay. Many people who grew up in Christian homes could relate to this conversation – when one has been raised by judicious Christian parents, says Dr. Cabot, one cannot identify a turning point in their lives in which they turned to God. “The question is not whether you ever gave yourself to God, but whether you are His now.”

I know what this is like. When I was eleven, I thought I wasn’t saved because I never recited that prayer that’s always printed on tracts. So I snagged a friend at church and asked her to lead me through it. Looking back, I don’t think I understood anything at all! I didn’t truly fall in love with Jesus until I was fourteen and had read Authentic Beauty by Leslie Ludy, which presented our Lord in an intensely personal way.

As Katy comes to the same understanding I found, her joy fills the pages. But she has to learn contentment by the only means possible: sorrow. The loss of family and friends, a broken engagement, and poor health give Katy plenty of reason to mourn – and to seek out her Savior. The journal spans twenty-seven years and ends on an overwhelmingly enraptured tone in the midst of chronic illness: “Yes, I love everybody! That crowning joy has come to me at last. Christ is in my soul; He is mine; I am as conscious of it as that my husband and children are mine; and His Spirit flows forth from mine in the calm peace of a river whose banks are green with grass and glad with flowers. If I die, it will be to leave a wearied and worn body and a sinful soul to go joyfully to be with Christ, to weary and to sin no more. If I live, I shall find much blessed work to do for Him. So living or dying, I shall be the Lord’s.”

True to the style of the era, the writing is verbose and decidedly untweetable, but I’ll try to pick the more succinct of my favorite lines:

“[Mother says] I am growing careless about my hair and my dress. But that is because my mind is so full of graver, more important things. I thought I ought to be wholly occupied with my duty to God. But Mother says duty to God includes duty to one’s neighbor and that untidy hair, put up in all sorts of rough bunches, rumpled cuffs and collars, and all that sort of thing make one offensive to all one meets.” (Chapter IV)

 “Moral – Mothers occasionally know more than their daughters do.” (Chapter V)

“Duty looks more repelling at a distance than when fairly faced and met.” (Chapter VI)

“It is not optional with God’s children whether they will pay Him a part of the price they owe Him and keep back the rest. He asks, and He has a right to ask, for all you have and all you are.” (Chapter VI)

“One need not be fanatical in order to be religious.” (Chapter VII)

“The only true way to live in this world, constituted just as we are, is to make all our employments subserve the one great end and aim of existence, namely, to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever.” (Chapter VII)

Many of my favorite quotes are from the earlier chapters of the book, when Katy is around my age and I relate most to her then. Later chapters tell of her dealings with the disappointments in married life, difficult in-laws, and lessons learned in the crucible of motherhood – all things I have yet to experience, but I hope that the truths presented here will help me prepare myself for my future.

I give this book six out of five stars and recommend it to anyone struggling with how to live in a heaven-minded manner while dealing with earthly suffering.

Some Scriptures on Persecution

Nero's Torches, Henryk Siemiradzki. An inscription on the frame reads: ET LUX IN TENEBRIS LUCET ET TENEBRAE EAM NON COMPREHENDERUNT.

Yesterday morning I realized, with some horror, that I never actually learned the names of the Christians who died at Umpqua Community College back in October, nor did I know the names of the 21 who were beheaded by ISIS nearly a year ago.

Lest they be forgotten in our fast-paced world, here they are:

Umpqua CC shooting deaths: Lucero Alcaraz, age 19; Treven Taylor Anspach, 20; Rebecka Ann Carnes, 18; Quinn Glen Cooper, 18; Kim Saltmarsh Dietz, 59; Lucas Eibel, 18; Jason Dale Johnson, 34; Lawrence Levine, 67; Sarena Dawn Moore, 44.

Those beheaded on the shores of the Mediterranean Sea by ISIS: Hani Abdel Messihah, 32; Yousef Shoukry, 24; Towadros Yousef, 42; Maged Suleiman Shahata, 40; Milad Maken Zaky; Abanub Ayad Atiya; Kirollos Shokry Fawzy; Bishoy Astafanus Kamel; Malak Ibrahim Sinweet; Girgis Milad Sinweet; Mina Fayez Aziz; Samuel Alham Wilson; Samuel Astafanus Kamel; Ezat Bishri Naseef; Loqa Nagaty Anees; Munir Gaber Adly; Esam Badir Samir; Malak Farag Abram; Sameh Salah Farug; Girgis Sameer Maglee; Matthew Ayairga.

The image of 21 men, clad in orange jumpsuits, kneeling in line on a beach with knife-wielding ISIS members behind them – it still haunts me, even after nearly a year. They are far from the only ones who have paid for their faith with their lives.

It reminds me of Revelation 6, where we see the reason for the judgments God is hurling to earth:

“When he opened the fifth seal, I saw under the altar the souls of those who had been slain because of the word of God and the testimony they had maintained. They called out in a loud voice, “How long, Sovereign Lord, holy and true, until you judge the inhabitants of the earth and avenge our blood?” Then each of them was given a white robe, and they were told to wait a little longer, until the number of their fellow servants and brothers who were to be killed as they had been was completed.” (Rev. 6:9-11)

God is just, and vengeance belongs to him alone. We see later in Revelation that God exacts justice on those who still refuse his authority: locusts with a sting as painful as a scorpion’s are released upon the earth to harm “only those people who did not have the seal of God on their foreheads” and “during those days men will seek death...but death will elude them” (Rev. 9:3-6). But God is still merciful; in not permitting anyone to die during that time, he is still giving humanity a chance to look to Christ and be saved. In not permitting anyone to die an earthly death, he also keeps them from facing eternal death in hell. I am not the first to say this: how severe are God’s mercies!

But what of his own children? If God is loving and merciful, why must his children suffer? What is our attitude to be, as humble servants of the Most High?

In response to being flogged by the Sanhedrin (the Jewish legal court) for preaching Christ, the apostles “left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.”

Rejoicing! They saw their persecution as a privilege.

And that is not all: “Day after day, in the temple courts and from house to house, they never stopped teaching and proclaiming the good news that Jesus is the Christ” (Acts 5:41-42). They never stopped!

Peter, who was one of the apostles flogged at this trial, passes on this attitude: “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.” (1 Pet. 4:12-13)

Paul describes some of his perspective on suffering in his letter to the Philippians:

“But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things...I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death.” (Php. 3:7-8, 10)

Both of these men do not shirk from persecution for their faith; they embrace it. “Fellowship of sharing in his sufferings.” I’ve been wrestling with this concept for at least a year or two, and perhaps I will continue to do so for many years more. When our friends mourn, do we not mourn with them? Why should it be any different with Jesus?

Again, if God is loving and merciful, why must his own children suffer too, and be thankful for it? Why is persecution such a privilege to these writers?

We find our answer in Romans 8: “The Spirit himself testified with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs – heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.” (Rom. 8:16-17)

I hope these Scriptures bring you encouragement. It is hard to see the glory in the midst of suffering, but that is where faith – the assurance of things hoped for – comes in. These brave martyrs have run the race in faith and shared in Christ’s death, and are now rejoicing in his glorious presence. Their faithfulness has been rewarded with the crown of life (Rev. 2:8-11). May their examples compel us to live out our faith boldly, especially because many of us are in a part of the world where we have the liberty to do so without fear of arrest or execution.

How have these martyrs challenged you in your faith? What lessons have you had to learn through suffering? Have you seen this as an opportunity to draw closer to the Lord? And how can you pray for your brothers and sisters in the faith who are suffering severe persecution?

Thoughts on Godly Romance, Part 4: Back to the Source

High school sweethearts, ready for prom!

Part 1: Courtship? More Like Legalism!
Part 2: Dealing With the Reality of Sin
Part 3: Putting Romance In Its Place

Amazed at how extreme Umstattd’s post was, I dusted off my copy of Harris’ infamous book and reread it. I am now under the impression that Umstattd and his circle of courters read mainly the title and skimmed a few pages in the book, then promptly left most of it unread, because nowhere in the entire 230-page book does Joshua Harris advocate no dating, or dating only in groups or with chaperones. In fact, at the very beginning (on page 13), he makes two things abundantly clear:

“1. I do not believe that dating is sinful. Some people have sinned as a result of dating, but I don’t think anyone can accurately say that dating in and of itself is a sinful activity.”

“2. Rejecting typical dating does not mean you’ll never spend time alone with a guy or a girl. There’s a difference between the act of going on a date and dating as a way of thinking about and approaching romantic relationships…I won’t say that it’s never appropriate to spend time alone with someone. At the right time in a relationship, if the motive is clear and the setting avoids temptation, going on a date can be healthy.”

Joshua Harris does not advocate an impractical theory of how to go from zero to married happily ever after; rather, he approaches romance with God’s design of marriage in mind. God didn’t make men and women for recreational relationships. (Tweet this.) The world may not know that, but Christians do (at least, they should). As a result, the way we handle romantic pursuits should reflect sobriety and respect for the other person as well as for God and his commands. This is not to say that Christian romance is full of dour-faced theologians who regard one another coolly; rather, it lacks the flippancy and selfishness that is all too common in the world’s cheap knockoff of romance. The latter is full of broken hearts and confusion, but the former should be filled with joy. I shall go so far as to say that kind of joy can only thrive in a relationship that begins with soberly placing it under the submission of Christ. (Tweet this.)

I say this simply because it’s what I’ve experienced. I read I Kissed Dating Goodbye in middle school. Being a middle schooler, I took an imbalanced interpretation of it similar to Umstattd’s, though by high school I was concerned with other things and mostly forgot about it. When a good guy friend asked me out at the end of our junior year, I said no initially, and then proceeded to grill him. For weeks. I asked him what he believed about God, about the Bible, about marriage, about courtship, about family, about career, about his character. I had figured that by that point, our friendship was strong enough to withstand such a thing, though looking back I’m surprised I didn’t scare him off. I tend to be pretty blunt, especially with questions like those. Anyway, we’ve been dating for a couple of years now with the intent of marriage and all is, for the most part, well.

In I Kissed Dating Goodbye, Joshua Harris identifies what he calls “the seven habits of highly defective dating.” I agree with what he says, and I shall share my own experience in dealing with each of them:

“1. Dating leads to intimacy but not necessarily commitment.”

Shortly before my dear friend ever asked me out, I’d decided I was done giving my heart away to guys who didn’t reciprocate my feelings. What does giving your heart away look like? You might think it’s only when you’re spending all your conversations gushing about your feelings, but it’s much simpler and subtler than that. I spent a great deal of time in my early teens obsessing over my crushes. I thought about them all the time, hyperanalyzed anything and everything they said to me, and wrote stupid letters explaining how I felt. Unfortunately, a few of those actually got delivered (I think).

So by the time my junior year was starting to wrap up, I realized how much emotional energy I was wasting and decided that whoever I might end up dating had to make the first move AND had to be of godly character. He also had to have the intent of finding out whether or not we were fit to be married to each other in dating; I didn’t think dating for fun would be conducive to guarding my heart. So when my dear friend broached the area of romance, I made sure he had the goal of marriage in mind before I agreed to date him.

“2. Dating tends to skip the ‘friendship’ stage of a relationship.”

I had no problem there; we became good friends over the course of a year, having many things in common and having most of our classes together every day. Personally, I’m not sure how you can find anyone dateable until after you know a few things about their personality and character.

“3. Dating often mistakes a physical relationship for love.”

Which is why at the very beginning we agreed on a hands-off approach until we were married. Now that we’re further on and progressing in our relationship, we’ve determined that kisses are ok when we’re engaged.

This is important because of brain chemistry. When you start a new relationship, your brain goes into infatuation mode for about 12-18 months. During this time, you see the person through rose-colored glasses. If you ramp up physical involvement early on, your judgment becomes even more clouded and those rose-colored glasses start filtering out red flags.

“4. Dating often isolates a couple from other vital relationships.”

This had the opposite effect for me; I became good friends with some of the people my sweetheart knew and my current friendships got stronger, partly because dating this particular fellow helped me realize that I’d learned some unhealthy relationship dynamics while I was growing up. I also found his mother a delightful Christian lady who has been a positive influence in my life. Regarding my own parents, they chose not to get too involved; when asking my dad if I was allowed to date or not, he said, “I don’t care; do whatever you want.” (That made me realize that I was an adult who was directly accountable to God. Then I realized what it meant to fear the Lord.)

Anyway, all this had to do with intentionality. If I had only dated him so that I might have a shot at fulfilling my hopes for a fairytale, I would have focused entirely on him and everything else would have been irrelevant to me. However, I wanted to know more about his character, so I got to know his family and friends, to see what sort of people he hung out with. I asked his mom how he treated her, and whether or not he was the same person at home that he was at school.

“5. Dating, in many cases, distracts young adults from their primary responsibility of preparing for their future.”

I would say that, marriage being part of most people’s adulthood, finding a suitable spouse is an important part of preparing for that future.

That being said, it was the prospect of marriage that made me, a college dropout, wake up and realize, “Agh! I need to get a job!” Weddings are expensive, and so is the cost of living apart from your parents.

“6. Dating can cause discontentment with God’s gift of singleness.”

Hm. We are created to have a lifelong companion in marriage; as I’ve gotten older and college and the working life has brought distance to many of my friendships, I find myself grateful that God offers us such a gift. At the same time, there is much freedom to be had in singleness. I can serve others more freely because I don’t have a husband to be home for or a family to take care of. Knowing that there may be only two or three years left before I marry has got me in service mode: I’ve only got a limited amount of time that I can freely give without the priority of a spouse, so I’ve launched myself into serving my church’s youth group. I can stay late nights cleaning up after a bunch of teenagers because I don’t have a husband who would like to see me after a hard day of work; likewise, I can go on mission trips easily because I don’t have a family who will sorely miss my presence for practical and social reasons.

“7. Dating creates an artificial environment for evaluating another person’s character.”

Again, we were friends before we considered each other romantically, so we never had the issue of putting on our best face when around the other person. I have also observed that homeschooled kids are more vulnerable and wear their heart on their sleeve, while public schoolers, due to the harsher social environment they live in, are much harder to get to know because they are so used to putting up a protective barrier between themselves and others. As former homeschoolers, my sweetheart and I are pretty open about how we think and feel about things.

I have a wonderful relationship with my high school sweetheart and couldn’t ask God for anything more. However, the reason for our strong relationship is not because we read books like I Kissed Dating Goodbye and applied its message religiously to our lives, but because we looked to the Creator of romance for guidance. When you submit yourself to Christ’s lordship and seek to please him in the way you live your life, you reap the blessings of obedience. (Tweet this.)

A Call to Arms

Raphael's Vision of a Knight, depicting the ideal qualities of a knight.

Some time ago someone sent me a link to the video Virtue Makes You Beautiful. I remember thinking, “Wow, that’s really encouraging. I really am amazed at these young men.” Then I thought, “I bet they’re Mormon,” the underlying expectation being that teenage guys in the Christian church wouldn’t speak up in such a big way to their sisters.

So I find out a little later that they ARE Mormon, and I was a little shocked to realize that I had such low expectations for my brothers in Christ.

I’m tired of low expectations. I’m sure you are too. I don’t want to write yet another post verbally flogging young men for their shortcomings – real or perceived – and I don’t want to write yet another long, whiny rant about how there’s no more real men anywhere. The former is useless for edifying others (well, both are) and the latter is untrue.

Instead, this is a call to arms.

The Christian faith and practice may be rather soft and fluffy in this day and age, or at least in North America, but there’s plenty of blunt, martial imagery in the Bible about what it is to follow Christ. Now is the time to wake from slumber. “The night is far gone, the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light,” as Paul says in Romans.

Ephesians 6 describes in more detail our struggle:

“Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the Devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.”

As Christians, we are part of a great spiritual war. Did you notice there are no retreats? Look again: “stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.” The war doesn’t go on only during the times someone makes fun of you for being a Christian; it’s not only when you go on a mission trip to a third-world country nor when you disagree with someone in your church. Every day is a battle, not only against our enemy’s schemes, but also against our own sin. Peter urges us believers to “abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul.” Indeed! “For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want.”

“But mark this,” Paul writes to Timothy. “There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God – having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them.”

Have nothing to do with them. Don’t be a part of their group. “Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.”

It doesn’t take a fighter to give in to sin and selfishness. What does require a fighter is rising above ourselves to serve God in faith. The Lord’s army of saints needs you to join in battle against the devil and his schemes. Show yourself a workman of God, who correctly handles the word of truth; pray in the Spirit on all occasions, with all kinds of prayers and requests; walk as children of light and find out what pleases the Lord.

The night is far gone; the day is at hand. Prepare for battle!